Sometimes…no matter how courageous you are…or how confident you’ve been on your own in the past… you need others to lift you up a little, to remind you you’re not alone, to encourage you to keep taking risks…
This is exactly what I needed this past September. I had left a good paying job (that I hated) and was struggling to make ends meet. I was nannying in Georgia and feeling frustrated and embarrassed that I wasn’t making use of my math degree and worse than that…I was out of ideas. A planner w/o a plan. Life, at 27, had exhausted me and my fire for living.
When my friend from swimming (in grade school) messaged me out of the blue I was so taken aback…it was the last thing I expected because I don’t think we’d spoken since about 2003! Even before reading her message I kind of assumed she must be selling something as that has become popular on Facebook…but honestly…she wasn’t! She had just seen that I was in a nearby state and was looking to connect…having had a tough year herself (and having found a solution for her unhappiness) she could identify w/ what I was going through and immediately I didn’t feel so alone…a cloud had shifted a little..enough for me to keep patient and keep trusting that there is a bigger plan I can’t see yet, and may never fully see. She shared w/ me what she did for herself to mentally and physically build herself back up and at the time I felt like her solution would probably not fix my problems (of course because we as humans continuously see our own problems under such a greater microscope than we do others)…
However, with time, and with keeping an open mind I started making changes. Small ones at first…reading the bible everyday …continuing to apply to jobs even though I had lost hope in getting one…planning and prepping my meals…getting enough sleep…etc.
I know it sounds silly but sometimes you gotta get back to basics, and for me this lead to bigger changes. This lead to renewed Hope (eventually)!
I left Georgia and came back home…again feeling frustrated and embarrassed that I was back home…w/o a career, a family, a plan…nothing but me. It took about a month for me to stop beating myself up and just start working towards a goal and that goal is to simply GET HAPPY! Stop beating myself up and realize that “nothing but me” is not the way I want to look at myself…that I am ENOUGH! God made me specifically for something and that makes me special. I don’t have to try. I do, however, need to take care of myself with personal development, fueling my body with good nutrition and exercise, and having fellowship with others (not putting myself in a hole!) So, for the past two months I’ve gone to church twice a week, worked two jobs and started as a challenger in a Beachbody challenge group…where (in all venues) we encourage one other, help one another, and celebrate our victories (big or small) together. It’s been an amazing couple of months and I am so excited for this new journey I’m on!
I’m constantly re-learning that life will never go as planned, but we just gotta keep doing our best and strive forward. So here’s to #living #Godhasgotthis