I used to think my life mirrored my relationship with God; if things in life were good, we were on the same page and if things were not going well, then there was something wrong with me. Granted, there has been things wrong with my choices, but I think I’m learning that it doesn’t mean “I am wrong”.
A professor once told me, that the pain we experience in life, just means we are living. We breathe, we think, we move, and we feel. Lately, I’ve been hearing this bit of advice through others and I am beginning to understand the concept of “being grateful for hard times”, being thankful that I am breathing, thinking, moving, and feeling. I can choose to make choices in an effort to numb these gifts of life to avoid pain and struggles, or I can choose to truly live for every moment, be present and active in the life God wants for me. He has designed a plan bigger and more satisfying than I can even put together (and considering how much I LOVE thinking up plans…that says something).
Going through the motions has a way of numbing our existence. Why are we so often afraid to choose feeling, breathing, thinking, moving…LIVING?
I learn time and time again that my plan, is not working. Eventually, no matter how unintentional, I mess up and I fail.
As my pastor this week brought to my attention, I don’t want to spend one more day living in a world filled with what I think I want, but rather what God knows I need, and the only way to get there, is to start small. Say yes to God; Give and spend time with Him, spend time with people, work hard at the work that is right in front of me, TODAY, and pay attention to the small ways God is trying to teach and lead me through people, by choices I’m confronted with making, and from thoughts and feelings I am challenged to deal with.
Saying goodbye to daily, meaningless motions, and beginning to LIVE by living for God and for His purpose for me, and not for myself.